Acid Reflux and Bulbous Cows

Well- I decided that a post about my true feelings on being pregnant was in order. First, I would like to say that I have made it to 34 weeks with NO BED REST! Hoorah! I know that it is not actually anything I had to do with, but I am counting it as a personal accomplishment anyway. I am just saying out loud - in case the divine-labor-fairies are listening with a kind ear- that Todd is done with this semester on the 14th of December. That is a Friday and I think I have a cookie-making party on the 15th, SO that evening or Sunday morning are very convenient times for me to go into labor. Really- I won't mind at all if it happens any time that week. Okay- message sent.
I am now in the part of life-creating that is so frustrating. Anything I eat or drink ends up burning my throat like crazy. I was taking prescription heart burn medicine- but it was making my stomach feel funny. That is the story of these last few weeks, (note- I said FEW)- Trade one pain for another. Do I sleep on my back and let my legs ache? Do I sleep on my side and feel the acid reflux all the way to my ears and feel my giant belly pulling toward the mattress? Do I sit to rest my swelling feet and have baby all in my ribs? Do I stand up and relive my ribs at the expense of my lower back? Anyway- I know that these complaints can easily be swept away with some sticky sweet comment like 'You are going to have a BABY- isn't that worth all of it?' Yes, I answer- but I am thinking 'How exactly does that make me feel better?' Oh, it doesn't- it is just to shut me up. My sister Kristie described my shape the best- I am bulbous. I like to refer to myself as puffy- but bulbous is really the right word. I am attaching a picture so that you can see what this word means when applied to a person.